Today’s MOZEN: No Time For Time

As I approach my 65th birthday, it’s a forgone conclusion that I’ve changed a lot from what I was as a boy and young man. I’d like to say that I’ve matured. Others will simply say that I’m getting old. Sure, I don’t have the physical prowess that I had as a rock-solid college athlete. But, I ain’t fallin’ apart, either. Most people tell me I don’t look 65. And, I sure don’t feel that way — well, most days anyway. Besides, I used to think that was SO old — like, senior citizen old! Maybe, it is. Hell, I just applied for Medicare.

But, perhaps, I’ve changed the most spiritually and emotionally. As time becomes more compressed, diminished at each and every moment, I have less of it to waste. And, it moves-on relentlessly and inexorably. Think about it; the thought I made to write this sentence is already gone for me and will be for you immediately after you’ve read it. So, I have NONE of it to give for thoughts, causes, and, unfortunately, sometimes, people, who are not worthy of something so precious.

In terms of time, one way that I’ve changed has been that remembering dates, even important ones, have become virtually impossible for me to recall. I must admit that I was never very good at remembering important, personal ones like birthdays and anniversaries, while at the same time remembering obscure dates like that of the Battle of Hastings — weird, I know. And, it’s gotten even worse. One might attribute that to a simple by-product of aging, i.e. our memories become more cloudy with the passage of time and the accumulation of so many experiences.

That may be true, but, for me, it runs deeper. Material things like time, hour, date, day of the week, and, often, even place, have no lasting meaning to me. What does matter is the emotion of the moment. THAT’S what lasts in my heart, mind, and soul. Why we loved — That we loved — is forever imprinted on my spirit. The details may have faded but the feeling created never does. It has just become more important to me to recall the experience of that moment rather than the details of when.

So, if I forget your birthday, please forgive me. I’m getting older and more feeble-minded. But, one thing that I’ll never forget — I still luv ya’!